I can’t believe this happened. Again. After the last time, I promised that I would be better… but here I sit. You were there for me when I needed comfort and when I needed joy. I like to think you brought out the best in me, always flattering my every movement. It broke my heart to see you there, shrunken… tiny… I pressed my hands to my ears trying to block out the scream “NOOOOOOOOO!” that echoed loudly in my head. But I had been careless, it was my fault alone and now nothing can bring you back. You have been lost forever, a one of a kind find at discount prices that these thoughtless hands destroyed with one washing. You are truly irreplaceable.
So farewell, I won’t forget you. I can only hope that this time I’ve finally learned my lesson. A care label is to be respected, it is not a mere suggestion; ignoring it will leave you with a sweater only slightly larger than a Cabbage Patch Kid: